There are more than 7 billion people in the world it wouldn’t be hard to find a lifetime partner right? Wrong! Although there are many fishes in the sea it is still difficult to find your mate. Don’t bother finding the perfect person because you will live your life in disappointment. Just try to find the right person for you. Here are things you should know before getting into marriage
Love makes the world go round
No it doesn’t! Don’t believe all does rom-com or afternoon soaps that your so fond of watching. Yes you need love to keep that marriage alive but there others things equally important like trust, respect, friendship and off course money.
Trust is something that you have to earn and something that you have to keep working on to stay happily married.
Respect is another element that you need to keep your marriage. Respect is out if the picture, is a matter of time before your marriage is thrown out of the window.
Friendship between couple is equally important. It is the best foundation of your marriage. Do you tell anyone your deep dark secrets? I think not. Being friends with your spouse simply means that you know every single wonderful and awful detail about your partner and able to accept them for who they are.
Being friends with your spouse helps you. communicate better. And communication is foundation to a strong marriage.
Culture and religion
I remember the first time I visited my girlfriend’s house (she’s my wife now) when we started dating. Her parents were talking loudly. I really thought they were angry because I was visiting their precious daughter. Since they were talking using a different dialect I could not understand anything that they were saying. Turns out that just the way they talk to each other.
Sometimes having different culture and religion causes misunderstanding between married couple. It is not a deal breaker though. You just need to adjust a little.
Money is one of the most common reason why couples fight. Some have different ways of managing money. Learning how to commuicate about money is an important aspect on how you can keep your marriage happy and lasting.
Some couples end up separating because of poor money management. Some couples end up in too much with too much debt due to bad financial decisions. There are things that couples need to know to better manage their personal finance.
Some couples make financial decision without telling their spouse. Look honey check out my new toy! Bad decision bro! Before purchasing that expensive Iphone X that you are drooling for months, consult your spouse. Believe me that won’t end up well especially when your budget is tight.
When getting married, make sure to use your savings when paying for the wedding expense. Don’t take out a personal just to pay for the wedding fees. It is not a good start to begin your marriage when with debt. Learn to manage your personal finance early.
Different people have different prioritize. One might want to make Dora the explorer run for her money by always allotting their money into travels.
A guy normally would want a car first before buying a new home. A girl notmally prioritize the opposite. As guy I have always thought that when you buy your house, it would be difficult to purchase a car. Not unless you wallet is like an ATM, then that shouldn’t be a problem.
Women normally would want children when they get married (there exemption to the rule off course). But what is the point of getting married if you don’t plan having kids. A guy on the other hand would tell you to enjoy the freedom of not having kids for a certain period of time.
Working versus stay at home. Some women would prefer to be a stay at home mom to take care of the kids. It is very important to talk about it before actually deciding due to many reasons.
Staying at home gets boring especially if your wife was a career women before. They loose their self esteem. So better to talk it out before deciding. In our world today, it is difficult to raise a family with a single income. Again talk it out.
If you hate a certain attitude your partner has before getting married, chances are you would still be pissed off about it after you get married. People don’t change. You just learn to accept the person in time.
So if your spouse has a problem with being monogamous before marriage, chances are they would still be the same polygamous douche bag when you tie the knot. Sure there are exemption to the rule. But those exemption are rare. Most of the time once a cheating bastard is always a cheating bastard.
If you hate the idea of your partner always hanging with his friends and getting drunk everyday. That won’t change. Or if your partner is addicted with video games, there mightbe a chance that he will lessen his playing time but don’t expect that he will completely give up his playing time.
The in laws
It is a great idea to know your future in laws. If they hate your guts when you are still dating, it would take a lot of patience and work to make them love you or even just accept you. It is not impossible though.
There are a lot of in laws who tends to enjoy being in your life too much to the point that even your decisions are being questioned by them.
If your in lawsis like that, it would be better if you don’t live with them. Find your own place to lessen your headache.
There is a chance that you will find the right person for you. Stop trying to find the perfect person because you won’t find what you are looking for.
Do yourself a favor and know the person before you get hitch. Once you put that ring on, your commitment starts. Your marriage license does not have an expiry date.
What are your thoughts?
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